About — Don't Kill Your Date

Attract the right woman into your life, one that will help propel you both forward for your highest and best good. 


And do it the fastest, easiest, and cheapest way known to man...cook for her.

We want you to be the best MAN you can possibly be - a confident, strong, leader who walks through life with a sense of purpose.

An attractive MAN who receives the attention of lovely ladies, fascinates them, and builds a sense of desire inside them to want to get to know more about who exactly you are.

We do this utilizing cooking, food, travel, adventure, and humor as our medium. After all, a MAN who can cook, excite, and make women laugh, is a magnet for women around the globe.

YOU can be this kind of MAN. We can help.

“Eating is so intimate. It’s very sensual. When you invite someone to sit at your table and you want to cook for them, you’re inviting a person into your life.”
— Maya Angelou

The art of cooking for your date is an incredibly powerful tool to have in your utility belt.

Think of it this way, if you had one powerful thing you could do to attract women to come over to your place, to be with you - alone - even on first dates, would that be a great thing to know?

What if this thing was not only sexy, intimate, and delicious...but also incredibly affordable!

Don’t Kill Your Date (and Other Cooking Tips) is just that.


Inspired by my real-life experience of being so damn good in the kitchen, I nearly killed a woman I was seeing. How? I forgot to ask her what she was allergic to BEFORE I made our meal.

I had prepared a fabulous dinner. She took one bite and clutched her throat, looking at me with panic.

"Are there peas in this?" she asked.

"Uh...no, I don't think so. Why?" I replied, concerned.

"Oh, I'm deathly allergic to peas."

Might have been good to know...BEFORE I cooked. 

Then she informs me that she is also allergic to nuts and some other crap.

So, do yourself a favor, my friend... ASK.


Have you ever taken a woman out on a date, spent a pant-load of money, and never seen her again?

You just wasted all your hard earned time and money to give a woman, who likely had no real interest in you, a free frickin' lobster dinner. And, trust me...they will order the lobster.

What if you learned how to know, with certainty, that a woman was attracted to you? You could weed out some of those tire kickers looking to score a free meal.

sort the true prospects from those who might just be in it for the free food.

Here's how we roll. This masterful step-by-step strategy has shaped hundreds of fabulous dates, and even turned into one amazing marriage.

  1. Build confidence in yourself.

  2. Learn to cook a little.

  3. Attract beautiful, amazing women into your life.

  4. Cook for them at YOUR place.

  5. Lather, Rinse, Repeat.

Sound simple? Well, it is.

Is it easy? Well, that is up to you…

This is what Don't Kill Your Date is all about - helping you become the MAN women are attracted to AND helping you to follow through. Get your dates to feel comfortable enough to come to your place for a meal, have a great time...and maybe even stay for breakfast.


 The road was not easy, my friend, but it was worth it.

I thought I had the whole “great relationship” thing all sewn up. I had a beautiful wife, a big-ass 4000 square foot house, with a dojo and a pub, on an acre and a quarter. I had three of the best dogs you could want - Nacho, Fajita, and Burrito. I was living in Houston, Texas, acting on film and television in scenes with several Academy Award winners, and running a successful house flipping company.

Things were looking pretty good for the Spike man, except...

Not so fast, there, Sparky!

After being with my wife for 13 years, thinking we had great communication, deep love and understanding, she decided to “go another way.” With my closest friend…A lot.

Yes, I caught them. And yes, it hurt like hell.

The very next day, I filed for divorce. There was no chance of reconciliation. I sold my wedding ring, and with the proceeds, I bought a Celtic Trinity tattoo on my back that says “Never Give Up,” in Gaelic, underneath it. At least that is what I was told by several Gaelic speakers. It could be a recipe for Irish Stew. 

I spent the next two months alone in my big-ass house, trying to figure out what to do next. The woman I loved more than anything in the world had just ripped my heart completely out, gnawed on it for awhile, threw it down on the floor, stomped on it, and set it on fire. I lost 30 pounds in those 2 months.

I call it the Despair-O-Trim diet. You know, the one where you eat almost nothing, drink way too much, and work out like you are in Special Forces, fueled by utter hatred and pain. Yeah, you’ve been there, haven’t you…

After two months of deep suffering, I was one tiny squeeze away from oblivion. 

One night when I was at my lowest ebb, utterly despondent and ready to check out from life, I put a loaded and cocked snub nose .38 to my temple and started to squeeze.

There on the brink of taking my own life, a voice from deep within, said “No.” It was't a scream or the voice of God, it was just me. My better self, stepping up. They were absolutely not worth it. Deep down, I knew that. More importantly, I knew I had more to live for.

Houston was now dead to me.

NOTE: People will do any and everything to rationalize, cover their butts, and make themselves feel better about doing terrible things.

And they did. 

After the whole Adultery-palooza thing, to add insult to injury, my ex and her new “man” were spreading vicious lies to everyone about me to justify their actions. So I lost my ex’s family, and even though my former best friend’s family was like a second family to me, they turned their back on me as well. A couple years before that, I had also lost my mom to a hard-fought battle with lung cancer. So, I had pretty much lost all my close family at once.

Oh, and did I mention I had my spine fused the year before?

I made plans to sell our home, liquidate the fifteen rental properties we owned, and I moved to Los Angeles to a tiny 800 square foot apartment in Koreatown, where I could not take my beloved pups. That was the hardest part. I knew four people in L.A. and had no idea what I was going to do. However, my ex-wife did agree that to be civil, we would sell everything and split the profits, so we could move on with our lives.

Fat chance. 

Instead, they moved in to my house…with my dogs. Instead of selling our business, she decided to manage our properties herself. I watched from Los Angeles as massive amounts of money were being piled onto our business credit cards. Seeing their continued recklessness as they ran my business into the ground, I filed for bankruptcy. 

One good note, my father who had been mostly estranged from me since I was thirteen, came to be by my side for my trip to L.A. He even gave me some extra money to get started out here. I will be eternally grateful for that. He died shortly after I arrived in L.A.

Within two years, I literally lost everything and almost everyone I knew and loved.

Sounds like a I was in a great place to start dating again, right?

Wrong…but that’s exactly what I did. I had a choice to make - either:

A) Let the actions of two very morally ignominious people take control of me, and drag me down to a pit of despair and failure. (AKA - They win.)


B) Face the situation head on, make a decision to defeat it, build upon it, learn everything I could to become a strong confident MAN who attracts women and amazing experiences into my life! (AKA - I WIN!)

I chose “B." I'm not saying the way back was easy. Far from it.

But, in the process, I found the absolute best way to date women: have them come to me.

I actually stumbled on the concept out of necessity. I was deadass broke after a couple years struggling in the acting game in Hollywood. I was literally down to my last dime, twice. So, believe me, I couldn't afford the lobster.

Fortunately I am a pretty good cook, and I really LOVE food! If you know how to put it all together, you have the ingredients for a successful date night.

Do you know how much it costs to bake a chicken, sauté up some green beans with garlic, and have a decent bottle of red wine from Trader Joe’s?

Less than $20. Yup.

That's the easy part. Getting the women to your place is where the real learning comes in.

I studied all the masters of dating and pick up. I read tons of self help books on love and relationships. I worked through several different types of self improvement therapies and hypnosis. And I did a lot of “field research.” I learned a ton through my successes and failures. I tweaked my techniques, I tried new things, I pushed women's buttons, sometimes for good, sometimes for not so good. It was all a testing ground.

In the end, I had many incredibly hot dates, and a few longer term relationships, with some truly incredible women.

Many breakfasts were made, but never any commitments.

After several years of “sowing my oats” I finally found the one that makes my heart go freaking pitter pat. A gorgeous beauty queen, who coaches people for business success, writes books, and co-wrote the screenplay for a film called “Bro” starring Danny Trejo... and she also makes me feel all goofy inside.

As I write this, we have been together for almost 6 years, married for over 4, and we have a bouncy baby boy named Declan William Spencer! (Who has already mastered the smolder).

Had I not learned and mastered many of the things that I now teach to thousands of fellas across the globe, I would not be married to this fantastic woman.

I would not have had the courage to walk right up to her, with confidence and a little swagger. I might have been too timid to be with the one that makes me smile like a Cheshire Cat every day. And did I mention, she is 19 years younger than me?

I learned, I honed my skills, and I constantly strive to learn new and better ways to be a stronger person, for my wife, my family, and all those whose lives I might be able to improve through my teachings...That means yours too.

Now I bring everything I have learned, to you, to help you side step the land mines that I fell face flat upon.

Learn from my mistakes, my failures, and my triumphs.

If I can Help you avoid going through the tragedy I did, then I win.

If you are ready to change your life, ready to attract women that will enhance all that you are and want to be, if you are ready to step into being the MAN you can be; then you have found a great place to learn some very valuable ways to get there.

We respect and want to attract strong women into our lives. In order to do that we must become the best and strongest MEN we can be.

If you are just wanting to get laid, or wanting to manipulate women to get them to do what you want; then this is NOT the site for you.

This is a positive place of support and growth, humor and substance. We LOVE and RESPECT women, and want to be strong for them and have them love us for it. Join us in our journey and let us help you hone your skills, improve your game, and become the best YOU you can be.