Dating

Get Cookin' with this Sexy Oil

Get Cookin' With This Sexy Oil!

I have a cooking/sexy tip for you this week. And it involves one of my favorite ingredients, grapeseed oil. Grapeseed oil has many uses.

1. Cooking

Well, this use is fairly obvious. You can cook with it, as it has a high smoke point and makes a decent vinaigrette. But, actually for cooking, I prefer olive oil. Blame my amazing culinary memories of our Italian Honeymoon.

Olive oil is cold pressed and has been used for centuries. It truly is nutritional and beneficial in many ways. The benefits/dangers of cooking with grapeseed oil are still unknown really and it is usually pressed using hexane and other unnatural junk. So go for cold pressed to be safe.

I use grapeseed oil for general simple stuff, as other oils like canola and corn oil are pretty full of GMO crap. I also use coconut oil and grass fed butter a lot. Add these into your cooking rotation and you will be very happy indeed.

2. Massage 

Oh yes, grapeseed oil makes a GREAT massage oil. A little bit goes a long way. I have tried other oils and they just don't measure up. Olive oil gets very tacky, coconut oil coagulates when it cools and makes a creepy mess, and Vaseline is just wrong (I was young and it was handy, don't judge.)

Commercial massage oils are expensive and not always natural, full of chemicals and nasty junk. Grapeseed oil is good for you, silky smooth and you can add your own natural scents. Just add a few drops of rose oil for a nice aroma or a little peppermint oil for a nice peppy "zing."

3. Lubrication

Yep, just like with massage oils much of the commercial lubricants out there are full of chemicals that you can't pronounce. These are things you know you don't want to eat. So if you don't want to put these things into your body why would you put those things on your most sensitive sexy tidbits?

I would recommend you do not put too much peppermint oil in this particular delivery system as the tingle may turn to a raging fire down below. Not that I would know this....

Also be careful adding anything that might compromise the strength of any birth control apparatus you may be utilizing, do your homework!

Oh, and one draw back of grapeseed oil is that it will stain your sheets. But that can happen anyway, so it's not that big of a deal. Of course, there's always the option of covering your bed in plastic sheeting. If you aren't afraid of scaring your date in a Dexter-esque nightmare, I guess it could be a bit of kinky slippery fun. Just don't break a hip.

Keep Spicin' It Up!

 

 

Your Dating Bating Average

Have you ever looked at baseball players’ batting averages? You see numbers like .240 or .330 if they are really good, but what does that mean exactly? Well, that means that out of 10 times at bat, they are hitting the ball between 2 and 4 times.

That means they are NOT hitting the ball at least 6 out of ten times. And yet, they are the best! They are superstars.

When you talk to a woman and you get shot down, do it 9 more times and see what happens.

After awhile, you will get better, and believe me, if you are having success with 4 out of ten, you bet your ass you are a superstar.

Put the Play in Player

We have a schizophrenic problem in the dating world these days. And the blame rests on both sides of the sexual aisle. On the ladies side, we have the ever present “Bad Boy” syndrome and the fellas have “commitment issues.” I think I have a solution for both viewpoints that will take a very long time to implement and possibly even longer to explain. But since I only have a short article for you here, I will attempt to be concise and give you a taste. So how do we clear up this hazy miasma of misinformation, disinformation, and all around butthurt? Well, by...

Putting The “Play” In “Player.”

So, on the ladies side we have the constant refrain of “Where are the good guys?!?” This phrase often uttered shortly after a “regrettable” albeit rowdy and oh so satisfying ankles to ears evening with a “Bad Boy” who didn’t call after. Of course you are upset and don’t see the world in a rosy light at that moment. You feel used, misled, yet desperately wanting more of that sweet sweet naughty connection. Oh the enigma.

You crave that emotional pull toward the man who can quench your thirst for ultimate release and satisfaction. That attraction normally comes from a MAN who possesses confidence, strength, and (hopefully) integrity. Without the integrity, you are simply left with a brazen manchild, who may fulfill you for a short time, but will, inevitably, leave you despondent and neck deep in Haagen Dazs.

Now, on the guys side, we have said manchildren.

The fellas that just can’t seem to get it together. Good looking? Maybe. Smart? Possibly. Wanting to have sex with just about every woman in the room? Definitely. They brood, they smirk, they do what they want. And in the end, much of the time, they get what they are after because they have game, confidence, and swagger. We call them “Players.” But that is not fair, nor is it accurate!

That label connotes that men are doing something that is not normal and etched into their DNA.

Here’s a news flash: Men and women are different.

If you don’t believe that; stop reading now and go arm wrestle your babysitter. Men are predators by nature, women are nurturers by nature. Simple reality. Understanding these different viewpoints, though, can be eye opening indeed.

So, we have Skippy Manchild, who sweeps women off their feet, romances them, then leaves them high and dry. Who’s at fault? Depends. You’re in charge of how you deal with things and your emotional state. If you are a willing “victim” of the player, the onus is upon you. However, if Skippy gets more than just attraction through deceit and lies, then the onus is squarely upon his lying ass! A MAN does not have to lie to get what he wants.

And here’s where we put the “Play” into “Player.”

“Cocky Funny” is a term coined by one of my mentors, David DeAngelo. It means, have the confidence to attract, and have the humor to relax, so you don’t come off as an arrogant ass. Many of the “Bad Boys” only get part of the equation. So when they attract, they serve the part of the female brain that craves the emotional stimulation. Funny or not, at least part of what the woman wants is getting served. In a pinch, they’ll take it. But then, men are labeled “Player.” An incorrect label.

What if Skippy Manchild had been funny, cocky, and respectful to his ladies? If he at no time misled or lied about his intentions? If he was simply being true to who he was as a MAN, enjoying the company of those around him, open and welcoming to whatever saucy times may come his way? Would he be called a “Player” or a MAN?

I posit that men, and women alike, can have a multitude of dates, lovers, or sexual dalliances, as they wish, as long as they are being safe, open, and honest about it. You can’t call a fun, playful, honest man with confidence, swagger, and attitude a “Player” simply because is successful with women. He is simply being a MAN. So have fun, laugh, love, and be honest about who you are, what you want, and never lie to get something from anyone else. Period.

Skippy, however, still has work to do...

What is Don't Kill Your Date?

If you didn’t know, DKYD is short for “Don’t Kill Your Date (and Other Cooking Tips).”

DKYD covers all kinds of stuff about the book, panels, TV show we are producing, the whole concept.

So for those of you who are new to us, well, there ya go…

***This is live, it is an 18+ panel, and Spike does use some some harsh language here and there, so be warned….***

And if you’re interested in watching the full panel from Spike Spencer’s “Don’t Kill Your Date (and Other Cooking Tips)” Live from Adelaide, Australia, click here to check out our playlist.

Thanks for watching!

The Eyes Have It All

The Eyes Have It!


Hey mister! Let me guess, you have studied all kinds of information on eye contact in regards to dating, pick up, attraction, etc.

Am I right? Of course I am!

There is SO much info and opinion on the subject that it can get so confusing that you just sit there and look at your shoes.

Well, I am here to make a very simple suggestion. Instead of worrying about all the techniques and timing that you feel you should have in order to make women attracted to you, let's get down to the heart of the matter and build from there.

After all, getting back to the basics is the foundation of all sports, business, and, of course, love success!

I remember when I was learning so much new info about eye contact and wondering if what I was doing was correct, I forgot the biggest part. I did not realize that I was giving away all my power and destroying attraction in a mere wink of an eye!

How did I do that? I looked away!

Yep, once you make eye contact with a woman, if you look away quickly and "shy-like," you have just demonstrated a subservient behavior.

In the wild, monkeys do the same thing to show deference to the leader of their group. On an instinctive level, you have just allowed her to take the dominant position. Bad start to your awesome confident male persona.

So, your job over the next week, is to pay attention to your behavior when you meet eyes with a lovely lady. Recognize what you do. Do you:

  1. Look away?
  2. Hold eye contact, show a little smile, and wait till she breaks contact? Or...
  3. Do you stare like you want to eat her spleen?

Whatever you do at this point, doesn't really matter. You are on the path. You re learning. It won't happen right away. But you can see how #2 is the clear winner!

I have done all of them and I turned out fine. Well, there may have been a restraining order or two out there with the crazy eyes, but overall, good things!

Next time you lock eyes, enjoy the moment, smile a little, and relax. Then whatever happens next, you've already won, by not looking away like a weak little monkey boy.

Keep spicing it up!

Keep It In Your...Pocket!

We all have ‘em and we all use them constantly – mobile phones.

They are our lifelines and our source of information and entertainment. On a date, they are also annoying as hell.

When you are with a woman, she is the most important person in the world at that moment. Period. And to her, you should be the most important person in the world at that moment.

Don’t be rude. Don't check or use your phone while you're with a date.

Just as important, don’t stand for them paying more attention to their phone than you. Aside from their “safety” call, of course.

If they do, you need to take action and stand up for yourself.

Should You Date a Co-Worker?

People wonder if it’s okay to date someone at your place of business. Well, that’s a hard answer. The truth? People do it all the time. Does it work? Well, just about the same as dating anywhere else.

Some do, some don’t.

But if you are at the same job, you have a much larger problem should things go south!

One of you is going to have to leave the situation, or your work environment will get pretty ugly. The only remedy for any of this is either don’t date at work, or just be so damn awesome that no matter what happens, everyone will be fine with it.

Listen and Make a Frickin' Decision, Fellas.

One Easy Way to Improve Your Dating Game

Here I share a quick humorous word on how to be super cool on a date. How, you ask?

Start with losing expectation.

Spend time with a woman simply talking with her. But more importantly, LISTENING to her.

On top of that, I discuss the MANpower of MAKING A DECISION!

I break down a quick and simple way to make yourself WAY more attractive to women… FAST!